abynav's musings

Life. As I see it.

2009-12-03T07:10:00.001+05:30

Its funny when I realize that there are some days when it seems that I had gotten up on the wrong side of the bed. Or rather, the right side of a wrong bed !

I have had many such days & it so happens that everytime I feel that my luck has departed me. In a drunken stupor. When am facing the enemy gunfire. Nothing seems to go right on such days. What do I do about it ? Well, I write.

Lets take today for example. Waking up late was only a precursor to what was about to happen to me. Actually, I am so certain of the glaring absence of my luck, I am sure waking up late only postponed the inevitable. Lets take you one night back. I was out with my friends, getting drunk, over the tales of a friend finally breaking up with his bitchy girlfriend.

It was no ordinary celebration. It started with the usual way though, with everybody ordering Buds. Once, one Bud met the other in the stomach, a plan was hatched. The Buds decided that they were going to party hard tonight. The stomach had to let it the two martinis who showed up for the party, dressed up in black, suave. The Buds & The Martinins started to know each other well and were starting to loosen up when hearing the ruckus, the Russians showed up, introducing themselves as Mr & Mrs Smirnoff. Now the party was certainly getting into the groove and the stomach was plum with satisfaction. Another knock on the door. In a typical western movie entrance, three cowboy Borbourn brothers from the state of texas showed up. Well, though a little hesitant to let them enter, the stomach let them in, thinking that NOW the party was EPIC ! But wait. A mexican gatecrashed the party. Wearing a red, green, yellow striped hat the Tequilla announced itself. You should know one fact about these mexican rogues. They never travel along. They always move in a gang. Suddenly before the stomach could really apprehend, four tequillas barged in ! That was the time when my stomach called the curtains on the party and I puked.

to be continued....in good jest, later

2009-11-26T21:31:00.002+05:30

How many times has it happened that you find yourself humming the same song for a week or thinking about the play you saw last week ? There are times when I absent-mindedly pick up a book and while reading, it strikes a chord somewhere deep. Causes me to stop. To ponder.
All these small mental stimulations work so well in lifting the overbearing routine'ness from our lives. We need to pay more attention towards them & learn to appreciate them even more...
For me, the written word does it !
It is the spring in the step of my emancipated soul. There re times, when a written line or a quote stays with me for a number of days and there are also times when a friend mails me 3 lines of brilliance that she wrote the night ago in a tumultuous emotional frenzy.
Words more than speak to me. They make me feel as if I belong. Literature is my poison. Something I cant do without.

Rest, laters.
Aby

an ode to floyd..

2008-05-10T20:23:00.003+05:30

sacred flags and the wing
bless the unprepared
division bells ringing
offset the trance
breathless guitar
nearing an orgasm
slowly the words
come pouring out
a dream on verge
of coming to life
lifts you up
and flies away
to the other side
a secret wish
emanates from
a mouth gone dry
and it gets louder
the crisp notes
of the music blessed
pour on the vodka
the illusion is alive and kicking....

undone stitches

2008-03-11T21:52:00.004+05:30

An excruciating white winter morning

The had been wood in the fireplace

Sweeps a nostalgic aroma across the room

The china glass lies on top of another

Whisky stains on the percian rug

Paint a myriad picture

of a gone by stormy night

Its funny how the wrinkle

Impartially partitions the forehead

The forehead I used to kiss everyday

Before going off to work for the grey suits

You were so naïve then

Loved me without a grey shadow in your heart

Your eyes, how I remember them

Shining with puerile innocence

Asking a thousand myriad questions

Each time they saw me leaving for work

It was a cold evening when it happened

I was coming home, driving

The image blurred by too fast

But the blood stains on the tarmac

Tugged hard the corner of my eye

The severed limb seemed unusually small

It was covered with shards of glass

The sudden numbness I felt

Or maybe it was the overpowering urge

To see your soothing face, I drove on

The blood, the twisted metal behind me.

Frantic calling of your name

Brought me back only empty silence

Your room looked bare without you

The yellow on the wall looked pale

I should have stopped my car

But how could I have known

Forgive me, my son

How could I have known

Now I met you last night

After what have been

Many a countless full moons

You looked radiant as ever

Angels have been taking care of you

You talked your heart out

Last night, in your baby words

Before you flew away

To the bright full moon

Leaving me an old and lonely man

Forgive me my son

But how could I have known

gravedigger

2007-12-20T22:49:00.000+05:30

burning lilies catch my attention
they have been resting neglected
since the week forgotten by.
they were soaked with tears
now they lie sorrowful themselves
the dust of neglectance screams out loud
with the goner, has gone the concern.

the soil is still impregnated
with the footprints of the loved.
the goner, had no footprints indeed
the ground is soggy and damp
the mastiff has been here since a week
clawing out the dirt, digging the mud
trying to find the inexistant.

it kills me with sorrow
seeing its dull, misty eyes
but provided me with a reaffirmance
that all is not lost in the end
when thread-bare relationships
feign a woeful ignorance to the snapping
of the already beaten-down threads
there are some, who choose to make a difference.

i am a grave-digger i dig the graves i make them shallow so they can feel the rain..............

can you see it ?

2007-12-12T00:19:00.001+05:30

can you see it ?
the face
glowing over tired dreams
flowinf effortlessly
merging with the nerve stream
runnig through my body.
the face
howering beneath my brow
knocking day
knocking night
to see if i exist
beyond the living
a face
hollow but heavy
weighing in my eyelids
putting me to sleep
only to wake me up
in the middle of the night
screaming
letting me a piece
of her broken emotions
can you see the face ?
that of the lady
that died
only because
i could not rush through
to save her, from herself..

sepia dreams

2007-12-12T00:16:00.000+05:30

sepia dream

recurring memories
of a sepia undertone
clutching that soul
refusing to let go
of the past
that no longer is.
she wakes up
sweating profusely
the memories are back
haunting her once again
again in sepia undertones
she gets up
face glistening with droplets
goes to the closet
it has to be there
the skeleton
that once was a body
her body.

jaypore

2007-10-20T14:42:00.001+05:30

For j,

Black asphalt beckons
stirs u the wanderlust
you by my side
throttle caresses the floor
like a taut silken string
thats been plucked
our bodies are vibrating
to the din of the engine
to the guitar being seduced
your gaze poses questions
questions, whose answers
we both know
have known ever since
i lean into you
to steal a kiss
but how has ever
a thing been stolen
when its already yours
we say no more
the guitar exhales
a low note
a sigh goes unnoticed....

a winter night

2007-10-13T14:17:00.001+05:30

seven matchsticks and the wind

a place under the sun

endangered by the other's existence

trying to stick close

to member's of one's kin

a matchstick sang out aloud

'' strike us and feel the power

its time you learn to play with fire''

the gust of the wind, looming large

laughed out a hollow one

'' i give birth to thee, letting you light

but today beware, for i want to fight''

with that off flew the feeble matchstick

wind blowing down upon its spine

emerald eyes scanning the dim light

spent the night engulfed in chill

for the wind stood true with all its might

with or without u

2007-07-26T20:11:00.000+05:30

sitting behind your eyeballs

the humunculus looks out

passing judgment

the editor of reality

tailoring the present

to suit the storyline

not realizing a glitch

the story isn't yours

enter me

egotistical bundle

of complications and love

rejecting reality

in the arms of the present

born a persistent

soldier of fortune

pushing you to the extremes

comes easy to me

sparking two degrees

of affection and ego

the story moves on

along with two

insatiable souls.

amen

BOOTS - on the run

2007-06-01T20:06:00.000+05:30

dust laden boots
speak the saga untold
boots on the run
they see the rising sun
everyday in lands unknown
crossing unkempt pathways
never meant for treading
boots on the run
trampling the dead man's land
and his garden of hope
passing by the caravans
stopping by the silent towns
boots on the run
lie lazy on the table
tapping to the cowboy's song
in the oak-wooded pub
bout the young gun in the town
boots on the run
always on the move
putting behind the miles
searching for the golden pot
of the exilir of freedom

cradle

2007-04-22T18:52:00.000+05:30

three butterflies and the wind
a new day dawns
starving for the truth
i am one step closer
can hear the perfect song
playing in my head
the velvet clock screams goodbye
as i head out for the day
photograph memories
keep on reminding me
of the days we spent together
i rush through people
not wanting to get anywhere
i would be lying if i say
it means nothing to me
you are the thoughts
inside this maze of mind
plugging my emotions
playing your voice inside
i am just chasing time again
on an endless day
so rush to me baby
let me be your cradle for a while

Supernova

2007-04-22T18:41:00.000+05:30

how many times do people change ?
strange little things with no name
together for life you were
all alone, the coming tide
like a fool you stood all along
only to sing a lonely song.

how many times do expressions change ?
the hugs and kisses look so lame
plastic smiles on porcelains
beat-less heart being entertained
to you it looked all firm and true
but the wave got it all unglued.

how many times do the calender burn ?
to again throw up the same days
nothing going right save the nightmares
you suddenly fill the chill
its the face in the photo frame
it soothes you like a good wine.

how many times do you dream about ?
lay awake hearing the voices
there is no cure for a heartburn
but for a longing heart
you know you are thinking right
so take my hand and come undone.

I am your Supernova
you got to look up into the sky

still waiting.....

2007-04-17T21:55:00.001+05:30

the tide is turning
running over the beat less clock
across the barbed wire
lay a waiting pair of eyes
green emeralds. tired. dried.
eyes that lay open
in the darkness of day
and have never closed
in the hopeful nights
still waiting.....
the animosity is a bygone
claim the suited bureaucrats
the have signed the dotted
'peace treaty' they call the miracle
guns have fallen silent
deaf
thats what they are
they cant hear the cries
the howling of the mad
victims of a blast they are
more dead now, than they ever were
gunshots still match the heartbeat
'peace treaty' they call it
still waiting......
if words are to be believed
toy soldiers will go away
miracle will come true
vegetables will replace landmines
spouting a greener tommorow
not the bloody present
hatred will be given a burial
barbed wire 'll be booted down
distance will merge
she will get to see
whom the emerald eyes are straining for
the miracle will indeed come true
till then
still waiting......

blind diamond....

2007-03-25T15:36:00.000+05:30

in responce to the amazing movie, which goes by the name, BLOOD DIAMOND...

A fragment of light
gives birth to a thousand daughters
caressing the diamond
as it lays still
basking in the glory
of a white flesh's touch
feeling proud of itself
for the emotions it can evoke
in that superficial layer
of a woman's heart.
With a heady feeling of dejavu
it looks back
at its incredible journey through time
conceived in the red soil
of the burning Sierra Leone
a soil red with human blood
a soil stamped upon by warlords' boots
it found solace in a black laborer's hand
before he died of a gunshot
a perfect shot by the child soldier
nerves feasting on LSD
his master calling him 'the soldier of death'
The diamond stood witness
to the burning barns, shattering windows
woman carcasses getting raped
eight year old hands
fumbling with Kalashnikovs
before it gets it eyes knocked out
by the experienced old hand
at the jeweler's fancy shop.
Now here it lies, the blind diamond
resting on an ignorant's neck
who keeps marveling at he pink color
but would never get to know
that it got its pink color
from the blood seeping through
the thirsty soil of Siera Leone

indifferent to sadness

2006-11-24T15:57:00.000+05:30

its barely twilight
and she has to go to bed
she looks into her mama's eyes
blue crystals overshadowed
with fear and trepidition
eyes that have seen a lot
massacres and murders
eyes that will never ever be the same again
thunderstroms rain outside
the air is humid and stale
her father's absence looming large
the sheep are crying outside
she guesses 'its the rain'
but it may be gun shots
thats scaring them
she is sad
she has no friends
all are dead by now
the village is deserted
but for the smoked huts
lying there scattered
but for the bloodied limbs
no two of which is distinguishable
she is sad
Grandma keeps mumbling
talking about the past
about a village
that once resonated with laughter
where safron meant gold
people had food to eat
she is hungry
yes, she is sad too
but it doesnt bother her, i guess
for she is used to living dead...

it never rained...

2006-09-08T10:05:00.000+05:30

seven dreams and a memory
countless winter nights
spent feeding the fire
still remember your face
emanating charm from across
secrets sewn in your heart
you held a lifeline in your hands
but you chose to throw it away
hollow promises, two summers later
a fateful night this.
you look weak. defeated.
still searching for your rainbow
but not willing to live with the rain
may be i should let you know
it never rained after that winter night...

2006-08-26T20:06:00.000+05:30

sometimes
the fairy dances on the flame
as i stand mesmerised
while the planet goes out of orbit
as your memories whirl past my being
again am refusing to let go of you
the flickering flame
plays hookey with my senses
the flashback pulls me down to a corner
as you smile in the shadow on the wall
as i try to find the strings
with which you push and pull me
the shadows on the wall
keep crawling to the forefront
will to pounce on the soul unsated
as the candle burns itself down...

under the burning umbrellas...

2006-08-21T11:53:00.000+05:30

the fish bowl is empty
paintings going black n white
rickety table
screams in the corner
my worlds been rocked
shaken and stirred
i wasn't the kind
but just couldnt know
when i grew addicted
you being my poison
a thresholds been crossed
the voilet blood stains
announce the verdict
as i twist and turn
in this cage of steel
deceiving myself
into believing
the penance is over
now
am crawling in the dark
for the lights to free me
the inferno chasing me down
with the virgin truth
to which you hold the key
i keep crawling on
as the moonlight fades
another night
gone to the butchers
now here i am
with a pounding heart
standing once again
under the burning umbrellas...

strange realities

2006-07-29T15:48:00.000+05:30

here i am
on the roads
that time of the day
twilight
sky trying to bed the sun
farcical rain
working hard
trying to drench
a heart parched

shovel

strange people
keep walking by
the plethora of humanity
gets overwhelming
right up to the brim
just when a drop
makes up its mind
to get over the brim

shovel

among the nameless faces
one catches my eye
you look strangely serene
walking with elegant poise
the chains dragging behind
kohl lining up the cheeks
the dagger shines bright

shovel

my thoughts betray me
bring me to my knees
as i plead

shovel
shovel
shovel

i hear
people shoveling mud
as i rest in peace....

shovel shovel

innocence nullified

2006-07-29T15:46:00.000+05:30

maroon ball
bouncing happy
goes past the unseen.
barbed wire.
bruised and battered
tiny feet
on its tail.
a gun gets thrust
full on the chest
dreams get shattered
future pilot, doctor or engineer
now labelled as an infiltrator
across the sight
flashes the sadistic heaven
a bricklayered jail.
a soul gets throttled
body black n blue
incubus jailor
on work at night
piercing the innocence
injecting venom
in a heart gone cold
time creepsby
the feet grow in size.
a hatred well-fed
sees the bright light.
out of the bricklayered jail
into the old world
but no longer the same
a world, now black n white.
the moment arrives
rough hands
feeling the cold RDX
wondering at the gelatine stick.
the hatred goes to work
newspaper headlines scream
a city gets bombed...

toy soldiers...

2006-07-29T15:43:00.000+05:30

toy soldiers
marching off
to battles unknown
the voodoo doll
lets out a whimper
you've been sleeping
all this while
lying beyond the boundary.
the wheels are rolling
as the time sleepwalks
coarse lines get drawn
criss-crossing each other
battlefield's burning
under the cold november skies
the thunder, the gunshots
and explosions on the ground
strange symphony's playing in the air
you have been sleeping
with your eyes open
all this while
lying beyond the boundary
the toy soldiers
fall off the cliff
as the tide takes your dreams away...

mystic night

2006-07-22T12:29:00.000+05:30

once again
am out on the streets
trying to hear
what the stars are crying out
deciphering the whispers
of the indolent moon
rhapsodies plunging
deep into the darkness
working their magic
it slowly seeps through
the arid heart
back of my neck
i feel a tingle
theres something in the air
prognostications
a sparkling energy
giving way
to the secret
letting me know
you are coming to me...

hysteria

2006-07-22T12:28:00.000+05:30

scream
revv up your lungs
nobody's listening
as i stubthe cigarette
on your arm
leaving more than a mark
cry out
suffer the sadistic streak
as i put the knife
cold
against your skin
drawing out the blood
habitat under siege
swear
the words come out
tumbling
unsure of themselves
having lost their meaning
the previous moon
spit
more than your ego
as you twist and turn
under my boot. dirty.
you cant get free
sweat
as you fear the outcome
the never ending battle
between the right
and the other right
scream
revvup ur lungs
you dont give up
do you..
a tough nut
let me set you free
i'll break the mirror.

at the crossroads....

2006-07-22T12:26:00.000+05:30

give it to me
Gasoline
want to feel the fuel
enter my veins
encapsule the entropy
in the hollow of my fist
As i look out
a cloud rises
uncertain. dark undertones
flashes a glimpse
of things to come by.
and the cigar whimpers down
to what i will be some day
Ash. lifeless. smoky
Breaking the ignomity
of suffering and ignorance
a soul screams.
shrill. sudden.
knocking the senses out.
the glass breaks
a heart thrives.
and here i am
standing at the crossroads
unsure whether to look behind
the epic of destruction
tails me.
Unforgiven.

what have you become .....

2006-06-28T10:06:00.000+05:30

here you are
standing soaked in the rain
trying to preserve your soul
not realising its already been flooded
flooded with empty promises, dreams
that once sparked a revolution
between the heart and the soul
none emerging the winner.
you look away to the horizon
tell me what you see.
do you see the winning soldier
at the end of the day retreating into the sky
or a dying warrior flung across the horse
coming back to his grave betrayed by his own men.
been so long ago since you stopped
seeing these images, hearing those sounds
somebody has put a blanket on your heart
and thus the fire no longer burns.
you carry through the day
listless dreamless thoughtless blind
not seeing the doors lying in the shadows
doors, waiting for someone to open them
longing for that one touch on the knob.
but no. you cant see them
somebody has put a blanket on your heart...

2006-06-25T17:51:00.000+05:30

insidious stream
washing down
the earth's cheek
with tears abound
chinar trees
lining up
the pregnant belly
of majestic hills
leaves whispering
the unsaid tale.
she rises once again
in the black of the night
walking on grass eroded
hoof, feet the culprit
amidst the maple leaves
she keeps on walking
with a steady gait
eyes shining bright
in the dark
looking out
for signs to confer
the presence of her beloved
the coward
who never showed up.
nowwith a heart
full of anticipation
she waits
waits at the very cliff
she jumped from..

a spell on me..

2006-06-18T12:43:00.000+05:30

standing in the rain
parched
a smile
a look
from you
floods my heart
you push and pull me
while i lose my mind
somethings right
everythings wrong
the mirror smiles
cracks up
from the inside
into thousand pieces
each portraying
the fire inside
and
you fan the air
you 've put a spell on me...

abhinav

kashmir

2006-06-13T11:22:00.000+05:30

Kashmir
once a heaven
always a hell
lavish saffron fields
emanating smoke
of communal hatred
once adorned by flowers
now nameless graves.
virginal streams
breaking through mountains
no longer carry
the Godblood
but remains
of dismanteled parts
once a human body
pasture fields
running full
of little boys,
high cheekbone
pink mask
shepherding the four-legged
now lay full
of landmines
occult landmines
unaware of their catch
music of bhand pather
flowing unheard
amidst
the soothing dose
of gunfire and bombs
promiscuous sprwal
of incubus army
raping women
raping women alive
raping women dying
raping women dead
raping dead women again.
empty streets
celebrating absence of
people gone underground
in safety of basements
people gone underground
in safety of their graves.
kashmir
once a heaven
always a hell
let me tell you
a secret
kashmir
turns into the heaven
it once was
in the safety
of the night
for that
i just need
to fix myself
another drink.

when raindrops get u thinking....

2006-06-07T22:49:00.000+05:30

here i tried smthing new...juss an experimentation.

pitter patter pitter patter

thus came falling
the silvery raindrops
announcing their advent
stamping their presence
on that cipher of a day
things scrupulously going haywire

pitter patter pitter patter

took out my hand
absentmindedly
palm spread
wide open
gathering the juice
of bountiful skies

pitter patter pitter patter

to feel happy for the raindrops
adorning my palm
or to feel flustered
for the ones i couldn't catch
was a matter of perspective

pitter patter pitter patter

perspective
a strong catalyst
that leads you
to see the drops
or the moon
caught in them.

pitter patter pitter patter

a feast..

2006-06-06T20:56:00.000+05:30

still tinkering further wid sufism, after 'a secret'....

A feast..

intangible memories
of your smile
flays off my thoughts
that puerile curve
at the end
of your lips
has become an enemy
of my peaceful sleep.
was it the figment
of my wild imagination
or an evanescent
divine prognostication
i see you coming
coming to me.
waited for this moment
i always had
now here i lay my soul
on the teak table
waiting for you
to feast on..

abhinav

the secret

2006-06-04T15:10:00.000+05:30

well, here is my ode to the philosophy of sufism...

What is it
that you want to know
tell me my love
for yours i already am
In your heart
lies the secret key
to the door
of my soul
In your eyes
lie the mirror
for heart conceals
but the mirror does not
In your hair
waits the night
that sweeps me over
with passion fervid
On your lips
rest the name
of my God
my only soulmate
In your ears
roams the song
which so passionately
speaks of my longing
What is it
that you want
tell me my love
for yours i am already
You say you want me
if u leave your self
drop your existence
you'll become me, without me.

abhinav

a friend...

2006-06-04T11:00:00.000+05:30

You were sad
You were down
Things got bad
You kept that frown
I ask you to smile
Before you do that
I find you’re gone
I ask you to take care
Coz sometimes I know
Life can be unfair
As long as blood
runs thru your veins
in between the pleasures
u will find the pains
who am I ? you ask me.
Had you looked
Beyond this dust
Of pain n mistrust
You would have seen
For all this while
What I had been.
For here I belong.
A friend all along....

abhinav

when loneliness bites...

2006-06-04T10:58:00.000+05:30

Slowly he opened the door.
Picked up all the broken glass
Furniture on the floor.
It wasn’t long
Before it came again.
Her memories.
Her presence was writ everywhere.
Yet she was not there.
It was dark.
He lit up a candle.
The shadow on the wall
Seemed to mock him.
He saw her on the candle.
Dancing in the flame.
Hands outstretched,
he longed for her
Only to get burned once again.
He saw her in the water
Filled up in the glass.
He picked it up.
Put it to his lips.
Not strangely,
The water was sweet…

abhinav

the master..

2006-06-03T19:35:00.000+05:30

here i stand alone
atop the cliff
looking out to the sky
right in the eye
trying to interpret
the omens, the signs
the ions in the air
that work together
in a subtle harmony
creating undercurrents
in my destiny
i take in a handful
of air
in my fist
fell the energy
pulsating
and take it
to my heart
a heart
that dreams
and therfore
make me
the master
of my own destiny..

abhinav

my oasis....

2006-06-03T13:39:00.000+05:30

left alone
wandering in the desert
will i get my oasis
lips parched, skin burning
heart bleeding, thoughts leaving me
i see the miracle
which only turns out
to be a mirage
showing me my destiny.
with mind full of prognostications
i carry on with the chimera
for i know
the dunes change with wind
but the desert remains unchanged
my soul keeps reminding
that the darkest hour of night
comes just before the dawn.

abhinav

you are...

2006-06-03T12:44:00.000+05:30

you are the sunshine
that smiles on my soul
crashing me, burning me
but making me whole

you are the rain
soaking me to the core
against the tide i swim
you helping me to the shore

you are the music
in my veins that beat
raising me to the crescendo
sweating me in your heat

you are the song
i wanna sing forever
leave u i might
forget you i wil never.

for you are..
my everything.

abhinav

do you remember....

2006-06-03T12:34:00.000+05:30

do you remember.....

do you remember the days...
we used to live
across the bridge
grass was our abode
and crop-fields our playground.
do you remember the days..
i was nine and you were ten
we had our caves, we had our dens
the sun used to set
when our games used to end
do you remember the days...
in you i found my alter
we did good, we used to falter
drenched in the rains
we often raced our boats.
do u remember the days...
we used to sing aloud together
sunshine, rains, whatever be the weather
together we used to catch the butterflies
and dashed to the end of the rainbow
do you remember the days...
now i dont know where you are
what your calling is in life
but my heart longs for an answer
do u remember the days ???

call of the highway..

2006-06-02T16:58:00.000+05:30

Call of the highway

Highway beckoned him
He got in his car
He had had enough
Enough of her absence.
Hitting the accelerator
He sped on.
He sensed an ecstasy
That always drugged him
To the cloud nine
Ecstasy – that is what
Her presence was like
In his veins.
He sped on.
The darkness goading him.
Moon being his constant companion.
Stars taking time out
To smile at the road ahead.
It started raining.
it always rained
When she was not there.
He sped on.
Then he saw her I
n the raindrop
On the windscreen.
A tiny drop
Slipping down sensuously
That reminded him
Of her uninhibited moves.
With that, He sped on.....

abhinav

kaaya's world - a short story

2006-06-02T16:50:00.001+05:30

Her heart skipped a beat. It always did the moment her tiny feet touched the sand. It happened unfailingly every time she stepped on the beach. The feeling of warm sand, tickling her toes, the sinking of her feet, while her heart soared…life was a fairytale when she was on the beach.
The sun was caustic. Her eyes looked over the horizon, searching for her favorite spot on the beach. There it lay, secluded from the crowd – her spot, her own space in the world. She ran towards her spot, her feet naked on the sand, arms stretched wide open to gather as much light as she can in her heart, her hair playing with the mischievous wind. She ran.
There she was. She sat down, took a deep breadth, and filled her tiny fist with the sand. It was wet yet warm, just like yesterday. She gathered as much sand as she could around her.
After about an hour of indulgence, she noticed beads of perspiration on her brow. She looked up. It was getting dark. She began moving her hands feverishly, giving shape to the shapeless sand.
There it was at last, her castle. There it stood majestically gleaming in the light of the dying sun. With an outstretched trembling finger, she wrote her name on it. KAAYA. So that anybody who looked at it could make out it was KAAYA’s abode.
But, she had no illusions about it. She knew that her abode would wash away with any incoming wave, at any moment. But did she care about that wave? She was only too happy to have her castle erected.
With a content heart she stood up to leave, fully knowing that it will not be there tomorrow. She went away, without looking back, to return tomorrow, for she knew she had a castle to be made…

abhinav

black night

2006-06-01T16:53:00.000+05:30

Can’t face it anymore.
I revv up d engine
Wanting to get away.
The loneliness was killing me.
Atleast the machine soothes me.
In d din of d engine
Silence can no longer mock me.
I speed on.
The wind comforts me.
Airs the damp in my heart.
Darkness too plays its part
Throwing light ahead.
Your memories are relentless though
Chasing me down the highway.
But I speed on.
Wanting to get away
To the other side of the night.

abhinav

3 A.M.

2006-06-01T16:51:00.000+05:30

continuing wid d oder side of d story of 2 A.M.........

its 3 A.M. in the morning
hes out somewhere,
out of her life
shes home watching the candle
its flame dancing in the dark
never been the praying kind
lately she had been down upon her knees
praying for something to happen
something that would tell her
not everythings lost now.
with every stroke of lightning
her eyes shone in the mirror
eyes so used to his presence
that she felt blinded by the moment.
she closed her eyes
so that she could see him
see him coming back to her....

abhinav

2 A.M.

2006-06-01T16:42:00.000+05:30

Its 2 A.M. in the morning
You ‘re home sleeping in your bed
And am out on the streets
Under the drugged skies
Standing in the rain
Holding my candle
Which ain’t giving light anymore
I know you had your reasons
Which were hard to comprehend
You took your own path
Leaving me behind on ours.
I guess it comes easy to you
Leaving when you r almost there
We were on the highway baby
On the highway to hell
It ain’t much fun dying
But I gotta die tonight
‘coz I ‘ve gunned down romance
It never did a thing for me…....

abhinav